Welcome Back Story, Contest

[Tobymac]

Due to a Tobymac being gone for 5 month's listeners were asked to recap what I missed in story form. Stories can be real or fake, can be no longer then two kmails and must include something from the past five months in one way or another.

First Prize: 1mil Franz1 (#2)
Second Prize : 500k Robivf (#1)
Third Prize : 100 Dry Noodles Soldan (#3)

This post has been edited by Tobymac on May 16 2012, 09:09 PM

[Tobymac]

Entries

3

Simply put, the biggest thing to happen in the last five months is the Path of Boris which allowed amazing feats inside the kingdom of loathing. Boris walked the earth in many different guises, slaughtering his way through the kingdom in a way unseen by eyes in recent history. Boris slaughtered things quickly, and his appetite for food and bloodshed was the thing of legend itself.

2

It was a cold winter, but my heart had been warmed by a shower of presents from Uncle Crimbo. What would the new year bring?

On the first morning of the new year, I heard the ring of my doorbell. Two gentlemen, Mr. "Dis Abled" Kloop and Mr. "Greaselweasel" Groose, were asking if they could join my adventures. But oh, what salary they asked for! Only the luckiest of gamblers could ever afford that, and I'm not one of them, so I had to send them on their way. I've since been hanging onto Mr. Groose's phone number which he gave me in case I ever need him.

The next weeks were rather uneventful, except when I found a strange red button in my basement one day. It smelled a bit fumy, like that rip in the space-time continuum that appeared when I defeated that nasty chick on top of that tower. I decided to not touch the button.

I got a bit bored so I decided to do something I never do: check out the ads that arrive in my mailbox every other day. Meh. Why do they except me to buy children's toys like "Rain-Doh", or hire an alcoholism mentor?

Ouch! That really hurts! Oh, you're curious what? Well, you sure heard that I go to service every week. Yes, in that temple in the woods, I thought I knew all the traps. But apparently I didn't. You know, there is a trapdoor in one of the corridors that I always walk through, but it seems i never noticed it was there. Luckily I wasn't a long fall, and the cave bars that immediately attacked me were no threat at all. Phew! Speaking of bars, I never saw them in the temple before. Maybe they installed that trapdoor.

That button in my basement kept intriguing me. But everyone told me not to get anywhere near it. People told me it was indeed related to the gash, which they told me is much safer... I trusted them, maybe I shouldn't have! Anyway, I stepped in..

The world ripped itself apart and immediately pieced itself together again. I was standing in a meadow, a bird singing on top of a small hill. I felt a weak strongness and unfortunately a much stronger weakness. Apparently I had grown thick muscles, but didn't at all know how to use them! A weird pig-headed guy approached me, playing a funny tune on a sackbut, as if he was greeting me or something. Since I am sure I'd never seen a pig-headed guy before, I asked him for his name. He laughed. "Oh Boris, don't thou jest! I was waiting for thee whilst thou were reincarnating! I am Clancy, your dear minstrel." Haha. That guy was hilarious. But... could it be, has my body been transformed into that of the mighty Boris? I decided to mimic Boris just to get accompaniment from that funny "minstrel." I must thank the dungeoneers in the mountains for helping me become more and more like Boris.

The weeks that I spent working on my mimicing skills saw a few events in the kingdom. The gallery that I visit almost daily had some renovation going on that made it easier to traverse, hooray! A very sad day was when the demon at the market went missing. It makes me angry that they still haven't found him and punished the kidnapper. Why aren't they interrogating the war veteran who overtook the business?

Around the same time there was a loud rumbling noise in the mountains, and a gigantic structure emerged from below the earth. People rushed in and started one-on-one fights and contests there. With Boris's muscles I figured I could go in and just knock them all out, but it seems the judging panel thought of that and decided to run matches that don't reward only raw power. It's still fun though, so I keep going there now and then to pick a few fights.

Well, that's it so far. Next time I'll tell you about the bugbears that are now invading the kingdom!

1

The world exploded and the adventurers all teamed up with Boris to try and put it back together. With the help of Trusty the trusty weapon the world was righted, until the Bugbears invaded. The world faces a new threat. Will you save the Kingdom of Loathing?

This post has been edited by Tobymac on May 16 2012, 09:04 PM