Title: What He Thought
Genre: Parody
Based on: Doctor Who
Characters: All Doctors + Companions
Summary: What the doctor thinks when his companions leave.
Rating: T, for teen
Warnings: None.

During his years, the Doctor has seen a lot of people come and go. Some left of their own accord, others were forced to leave, others... lost their lives. But what was going through the Doctor's head when his companions left him?...


-1st Doctor-

Susan: The Doctor's granddaughter (Biological granddaughter, alright!?), fell in love with a freedom fighter on Earth and "decided" to stay there with him.

"Finally, I can dump her somewhere! Without her getting kidnapped or spraining her ankle every two minutes, I should be able to defeat the evils of the universe twice as easily... Although it will get difficult to locate those evils now, without her high-pitched screams to guide me... Wait, what's that, dear? You want to come back in? Er... No, I want you to have a normal life and a place to call home. Don't worry, I shall come back, yes, I shall come back.. I'm never coming back."



Barbara Wright and Ian Chesterton: Susan's school teachers, were meant to be used as teaching tools when the show still had educational roots. You know, the minute that lasted. Left with a Dalek time machine and went back home.

"Now that these two are gone, maybe me and Vicki will get some time to know each other... I just have to regenerate into an incarnation with a thingie that still works".



Vicki: A replacement for Susan. Fell in love with a soldier and decided to stay on ancient Earth. Exactly like Susan.

"I'm going to miss Susan model II. But that's ok, I'm sure there'll be one just along the corn- Oh, hello young lady, come into my police box, I've got candies".



Steven Taylor: Action man. That's about it.

"I don't remember ever inviting him along... I never got him a rent book, did I?



Katarina: Girl from ancient Troy. Dies in like five minutes into her first journey aboard the Tardis.

"I'm glad all her stuff is still in their boxes".



Dodo Chaplet: Susan model III, now with more annoying! But comes with a nifty hat.
Disapears halfway through a story and is promptly forgotten by everyone.

"I wonder what's for dinner..."



Polly and Ben: A sailor and a waitress. The first companions who saw the Doctor regenerate and some of the few who actually made it home safely, at the right time, and without any lasting physical or mental damage. Were replaced by Jamie.

"Well, lose a girl in a dress, win a girl in a dress... But her legs sure are hairy. Wait a minute."

Stay tuned for The 2nd doctor!

Review is here.

-The 2nd Doctor-

Victoria: 19th century girl who embarked on the Tardis after her father died protecting the Doctor. Screamed, a lot. Stayed in the 20th century because she found life in the Tardis too stressful.

"Susan model IV was the loudest yet. Hmm... I hope we'll run into another young girl soon, I can't imagine what the people on 21st century internet will be writing if they ever hear about two men travelling alone in a police box".

Jamie and Zoe:18th century piper and futuristic "21st century" genius girl. Left the Tardis when the Time Lords caught up with the Doctor and exiled him to Earth.

"I truly will miss Zoe and Jamie. They were truly fine companions. If I had one wish, it would be to find someone with the best traits of both of them... namely, Jamie's kilt and Zoe's catsuit.

-3rd Doctor-

Liz Shaw: Scientific advisor for UNIT. She was smart, capable, strong... basically, everything a companion of the Old Who shouldn't be.


"So they replace my brilliant, capable, efficient assistant with a bumbling, ditzy comic relief? Who the hell is running this organisation?"

Jo Grant: Comic relief mentionned above. Rather scattered brain, but very loyal. Like a dog. Leaves the Doctor when she weds an ecologist.

"I don't understand why she has to leave me just because she's getting married, I mean, a lot of women keep their jobs after tying the knot. Oh, wait, this is 1960's Earth... or is it 1970... or 1980? Gosh, someone get me a calendar."

-4th Doctor-

Sarah-Jane Smith: Feminist reporter who joins the 3rd Doctor, and continues to travel with the fourth Doctor. Has to leave when the Doctor returns to Gallifrey.

"Ah, Sarah-Jane, one of my best companions, I could truly have fallen for you, but you're so young... I'm come back for you, yes, I will... when you're a bit older. Hopefully, I won't have regenerated into a twenty years' old body by then, that would be ironic, huh".

Harry Sullivan: Action man who worked for UNIT. His role became redundant when the fourth Doctor was able to pull off his own stunts.

"I should try and travel only with girls from now on. Action men make me look bad".

Leela: Savage alien who likes to wear skimpy outfits. Marries a native Gallifreyan five minutes after they meet.

"Alright Leela, let's go... what, you're staying? Whhhyyy? I'll have to wait two more regenerations to get a companion who wears as little clothing as you, and I know she won't be half as useful!"

Romana: A Time Lady who joins the doctor to help him look for the key of time. The first Romana was a cold fish, the second regeneration acted more like the fourth doctor.

"Maybe if I hit her over the head to have her regenerated, she'll turn into a sensible incarnation that won't leave me to stay in an alternate universe filled with horrible monsters.