Didn't It Blow Your Mind, Claude Frollo? [REVIEWS], Well, It Blew Our Minds!

Yay! No sappy lovey-dovey scenes!

That outfit sounds "flamboyant", not "suave", if you catch my meaning...

Not at all.

There were also drugs and a scuffle or two...

Yeah, right.

I was under impression that Doctor was non-violent when possible...so yeah, Sailor Pluto would probably work better.

Good job, as always.

CrazedWriter writes like a sugar-high preteen. I mean, she has the characters singing "modern" music because she thinks it's funny, plus Iggy as the "hyper" OC telling unfunny jokes. The similarities between this and those fics where a trio of obnoxious girls rape canon are uncanny.

Maybe I have a dirty mind, but I got some really creepy pedophile vibes from these lines of dialogue. Probably it was the use of the word "treat".

Me too.

You shouldn't be talking about those times at all, whether happy or sad, you dumbass! Your actions have probably caused the universe to implode; thanks a lot, bitch!

With all the '60s references CrazedWriter is putting in this story, why didn't she just write a story about Iggy and Fern in the '60s? Why did she need to put Frollo and medieval Paris in it at all?

Yeah; I have the feeling that medieval people wouldn't think it was so wonderful.

Good one! By now I'm almost hoping Phoebus draws his sword and goes on a killing spree.

Quasimodo...with a harmonica...Stevie Wonder? I just...what is this...I don't even...

Sorry. CrazedWriter has reduced me to incoherence.

Unless the "punishment" is something kinky.

This makes me want to watch "Where in Time is Carmen Sandiego?". That show could teach CrazedWriter a thing or two about time travel.

No kidding; in fact, that's painfully unfunny. Moreover, I assume Iggy was doing the impression in English, so how the hell could people understand him? They'd think he was a madman, standing by a horse and randomly talking in a foreign language.

It makes me much happier to imagine the patrons booing, hissing, and throwing rotten eggs at Danisha and Iggy.

Point Mac!

After this is done, can we please write parodies where time travelers have to go back in time and kill Danisha so that the future can exist? You can do the Doctor or Sailor Pluto, and I'll do the crew of the Enterprise, and somebody might want to do the characters of Back to the Future.

I don't even like Phoebus that much, and I still hate CrazedWriter for portraying him like this!

Better yet, how about some FRENCH? Did CrazedWriter forget this story takes place in Paris?

Oh, God, I really don't want to read that...

Awesome job, Mac!

Amarth:

Oh, I do. There were times I read his outfit descriptions and thought Frollo was on his way to the Gay Pride Parade.

Not even to mention the Manson family...

When possible...but there is a reason the Daleks call him the "Oncoming Storm."

Jules:

I know. And the preteens at least have their age to partially blame. We look at it and go "Oh, will they be embarrassed when they get older." CrazedWriter doesn't have this excuse.

Wait till the end...

Because Frollo is the sexxors!

Happened to me a few times, don't worry.

Apparently the people of medieval Paris speak English despite the fact that the French and the English DESPISE each other.

Us too.

I'm game.

Thanks for the review.

Can I join?

Not that familiar with "Back to Future", but I'll manage someone or something else...maybe White's "living-backwards-in-time" Merlin...that would make sense.

Or Terminator.

Of course you can join!

I'm doing the Doctor just because I already imagine him pairing up with a member of the PPC.

Thanks for the warning.

Seriously? They couldn't have discovered the culprit, at least?
And, like you said, notes. Even if they took them, he still should have had the knowledge in his brain. And I'm sure that another university would have loved to get its hands on it. If nothing, surely someone got that it was a political move and wouldn't mind providing a bona fide genius a safe haven in exchange for the prestige his name would bring.

*dies*

*is revived*
Oh, Jonas, I needed this after nearly being driven to tears with frustration today.

Seriously, does Suethor=no gaydar or something? At least Angey ignored the hints on the movie,but CW actually writes it?
Or is she trying to be "smart" and tease on purpose?
I'm half-tempted to actually ask...

Well, it's possible that the expolsion did drive him to drugs...and yeah, he probably knows the reasons and won't share.
But it's pretty obvious. Why do they act like it's an ingenuous breakthrough?
(That was a rhetorical question.)

That doesn't exclude "bi".

Er..the what hat?
(And is "beribboned" even a word?)

Matchy-matchy much, Danisha? On the other hand, their respective outfits don't match at all.

Angey flashback!

To what?
Oh. Play the piano.

Maybe it fell down, but missed them. Even Powers That Be have problems with Sues.

That's actually very distracting.

Sacrilege! No one taints the heavenly chocolateness of the brownies with anything! You are only allowed to add ingerdients that enchance the taste of the divine substance that is chocolate! Smite the infidel!

Don't. Just don't. It will probably be the worst possible selection.

Well, according to BDSM erotica, modern, progressive, succesful woman needs a man with a torture chamber...

It's not very likely it's still there.

Great job, as always.

The culprit will eventually be revealed. This is CrazedWriter's idea of "suspense."

I know. CrazedWriter makes it sound like Berkeley was the only school in the country. Maybe if it was the best for his research...but there are other schools. Most of the ivies are on the East Coast. CrazedWriter has set this is in Indianapolis, Indiana when they are in the future. Notre Dame University is Indiana and is one of the best universities in the country. He could've continued his research there. Or gone out of the country, even! That might've been even better for his research.

Glad to help.

Apparently not.

You could try. Don't know how or if she'll actually answer.

It's much worse in "Back to the Frollo."

But they dropped an instrument that wasn't even invented yet?

Thanks for the review!

Now I'm curious.

Mac: Excuse me while I go throw up.

At least she didn't describe it in detail...though the little she did say is bad enough.

Quatre: Excuse me while I go throw up.

Me too. *hurls violently* I swear, it's not bad enough CrazedWriter has a crush on Frollo, but she has him act so OOC he might as well not be Frollo! Seriously: I don't think she's attracted to Disney!Frollo at all, because this character doesn't look or act like him!

Damn, that was a lot of vomiting. Did everyone have to leave?

Remus and Mac: Of course he is!

Isn't everyone in CrazedWriter's stories a "whiz in the kitchen"? Not that I'm against admiring good cooking skills, but by now it's getting kind of excessive.

Octavius: This is getting into slash territory�

How could CrazedWriter not notice it?!

This is ridiculous. How do the people of medieval Paris put up with her odd behavior? Plus it sounds like she dresses like an old lady.

Angey flashbacks! The horror!

Maybe that student who builds the time-traveling cars built a time-traveling U-Haul.

Now I picture Claude Frollo singing, interrupted with loud smooching noises. It's not pretty.

How much do you wanna bet this guy's a strawman racist too?

Mac: Yet you won�t speak for him.

Way to make me hate Danisha even more, CrazedWriter. Honestly, does she ever stand up to Frollo over anything important? She'll yell at him over his taking away her baseball and argue about a party, but she won't say anything when a man's being falsely accused of a crime?

Danisha is such a doormat: she just automatically agrees with all Frollo's opinions, no matter what they are. It's disgusting.

It was...epic.

Tell me about it.

I think I make the riff in "Back to the Frollo" where we come to the conclusion that it's not Frollo, it's CrazedWriter's perfect man masquerading as Frollo.

I'm starting to think CrazedWriter is one of those people who can burn water.

That has to be it.

I know. I can understand Frollo, but not Danisha. She argues the wrong damn things. And it wouldn't be too bad if we weren't supposed to root for her or show her regretting her actions.

And CrazedWriter thinks she's writing a modern, progressive woman. She wouldn't know one if she walked up and said, "Hi, I'm a modern, progressive woman."

Thanks for the review.

If you count billberries...

Interestingly enough, when I saw Frollo getting a message about a box, I was sure he would jump to conclusions and accuse Danisha or Iggy of stealing it and bringing it to future...
But that makes too much sense to be in this fic, doesn't it?

I'm sure that in that time period in France, the number of people who saw an Etiopian could have been counted of fingers. No, seriously. Second, even those familiar with them probably thought them heathen barbarians.

Great job, as always!

Yep. Especially since Danisha seems to be Frollo's one twu wuv despite him having 20 other mistresses.

I'm sure. CrazedWriter likes to call herself Danisha a "Nubian princess" and has others do it in her stories when I'm sure in real life, they would be calling her a "Moor" and suspecting her of practicing Islam.

(And actually, Ethiopia has been Christian for several centuries and those familiar with the country would know that).

Thanks for the review!

Man, this guy has poor memory. Is he supposed to be senile?

Why does CrazedWriter apparently think anything can be cured with food? At some points, it's almost creepy; it reminds me of the witch from "Hansel and Gretel" fattening Hansel up in order to cook him for dinner.

Okay, I'm getting slash AND incest vibes from that line.

And yet she still said nothing!

Okay, now *I* don't want to live on this planet anymore.

Or Samuel Sword!

Tavernstock! That should be a meme!

I am not impressed. Hercule Poirot could sleuth circles around Frollo.

Oh, God...and this is so degrading too! Danisha and the other FSM please Frollo, so he decides to have sex with them as a reward?! What?! He just needs to have sex with them and they become devoted, groveling slaves?! Is he going to promise them new dresses and sweets as rewards for good behavior next?! This is how you treat pets and slaves, not free women!

Well, it's official: CrazedWriter's fics are some of the most misogynistic, degrading pieces of shit I have ever read.

CrazedWriter, do you by any chance picture medieval French chateaux as fancy resorts? Because you're dead wrong, as usual.

And they bribe her with food too. Somehow I'm not surprised. Although I am a little surprised Danisha isn't morbidly obese by now.

This exchange made me laugh so hard. It would explain a lot too, such as why Daddy Duke and Mama Duchess have modern American names!

For a moment I was afraid CrazedWriter had dragged "Aladdin" into this mess.

It's just a poor plot device to make sure Frollo gets the message rather than, you know, maybe having him pick up the wrong pager while getting dressed?

Well, Danisha is "voluptuous." I usually don't like to insult the author, but in this case, I have a feeling Danisha is slimmer than CrazedWriter.

We can go shopping for other planets together.

Hey, I'm not trying to be subtle with that name.

Hee, we can have our own meme.

Oh, I know. Danisha is not a progressive, modern woman. She's no better than a whore and tries to pretend like her shit doesn't stink. But the truth is CrazedWriter is just writing a woman who had to go back in time to find someone to have sex with and is sharing him with 20 other women.

But it would explain Danisha's "sistah-with-a-tude" moments. She honestly has no self-esteem so she takes a man who sleeps with other women (and doesn't hide it!), befriends those other women and then has to prop herself up by putting others down.

Too bad that's probably not how CrazedWriter sees it.

Everything sounds more 19th century than 15th.

It would, actually.

Imagine what she would do? I mean, in the Disney Seven, she went for the princess rather than the all-powerful genie.

Thanks for the review!

Cool! What's the name of the place in "A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" where they custom-make planets? Magrathea?

That would explain a lot. I thought it was just because she was obnoxious and immature, but your explanation seems more rooted in psychology.

She'd probably start lusting after Jafar, though at least he's slightly better-looking than Frollo.

I'm sure being obnoxious and immature play a part as well, but it just hit me when I was thinking about what type of woman would be okay with her man sleeping with 20 other women. And then wait until you read about her high school reunion. Once again, I hate to insult the author, but if Danisha isn't meant to have low self-esteem, CrazedWriter might and is unknowingly projecting it on her ideal self.

You know what, after Frollo, I'd understand Jafar.