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Title: Movie Reviews


banker - November 27, 2004 04:35 PM (GMT)
Well, the holiday season is here, and of course, that means Hollywood will be going mad realeasing big movies.

So far, I've seen Bridget Jones and Christmas w/ the Kranks.

Bridget Jones, hilarious. I am slightly miffed that everyone is contantly calling her fat. She is not fat. She is simply not so skinny you're afraid of breaking her if you hug her. Honestly, she's about the same size as me. And not only do I not consider myself fat, but other people accuse me of being almost too skinny, where's the happy medium. She's 10 lbs lighter than me for christs sake. And of course, they put her in too tight clothing to make her look bigger than she is. Anyone will look fat if they put her in a tank top two sizes too small so it's cutting into her shoulders and riding up her stomach. I will say this though for all you men out there thinking, pashaw, who the hell wants to see Bridget Jones? Her breasts are huge and are rather prevelently featured throughout the whole movie.

Christmas w/ the Kranks. Chosen soley to appease the masses. The masses being the kids vs the adults. Kids, just wanted to see a movie. Adults, wanted to see Colin and Jared get some hot man lovin in Alexander (okay, so that's why I wanted to see it. everyone else just wanted to see it). Christmas w/ the Kranks was the only one we could all agree, "we wouldn't be pissed off to have to see"

Godric - November 27, 2004 08:36 PM (GMT)
In the books, Bridget is quite fat, by UK standards. For the first film (which had its moments) Rene Zellweger gained 25lbs, but for Edge of reason (at best tolerable, at worst, singing Madonna in a Thai prison, which I only didn't walk out of because I heard there was a lesbian kiss at the end) she only gained 10.

banker - November 28, 2004 05:17 AM (GMT)
Umm, I'll ask the question that I'm sure everyone else is wondering. Godric, have you actually read the Bridget Jones books? Not that it's bad, it's just...odd. And just for the record, I'm now irked w/ Godric because he has inadvertantly called me fat, because yes, I have 10lbs on her weight from the books.

Godric - November 28, 2004 05:21 PM (GMT)
Yeah, I read the Bridget Jones books, well beforehte movies came out. I was told that they were better than Adrian Mole, and although they were quite enjoyable, and had a shole menagerie of characters you could relate to, they're nowhere near the level of Sue Townsend's works of geius (though i've yet t read Adrian Mole and the Weapons of Mass Destruction).
As usual, I apologise wholeheartedly for any offence I may may have caused to anyone on these boards.
I should make that my signature...

banker - November 28, 2004 11:57 PM (GMT)
Nah, I could never stay miffed at ya for longer than it takes me to write that I'm miffed at ya.

I saw an older movie today, but one that I had been wanting to see for awhile. The Dangerous Lives of Alter Boys. This was quite good. I'm still formulating what I think of it, I'll have to come back.

At the moment I'm watching Return of the King. Anyone ever heard of it?

Irish J - November 29, 2004 08:53 AM (GMT)
Elvis' zombified body returns to Graceland to rid it of Sinners. Co-Stars GWB.

Minus 4 stars.


Lupinfan80 - December 11, 2004 01:50 AM (GMT)
I saw 'Oceans's 12' today, a movie I was really looking forward to. In all, it was decent, but not nearly as good as the first one. It had a lot of humor and plenty of eye candy (including the ever charismatic Vincent Cassel). However, a lot of it seemed confusing, too. There were more plot twists this time around, but not all of them completely made sense. Also, some scenes, including one with Bruce Willis, seemed to go on too long. I wouldn't tell anyone not to see it, but I just wanted to warn fans of Ocean's 11 who had high hopes.

Cat_on_my_head - December 13, 2004 03:58 AM (GMT)
We rented Dodgeball last night. Seriously hilarious. I expected it to be funny, but it was even funnier than I expected it to be. Also, one of the characters was a pirate! A PIRATE! (J! A PIRATE! :arr: ) Pirates are the best. Also, Jason Bateman has this fantastically stupid little part. (Jason Bateman, currently of Arrested Development fame, I have a total crush on. ^_^ )

So, hehe, my kind of movie! :D

SakuraKinomoto03 - December 13, 2004 02:25 PM (GMT)
QUOTE (Cat_on_my_head @ Dec 12 2004, 10:58 PM)
We rented Dodgeball last night. Seriously hilarious. I expected it to be funny, but it was even funnier than I expected it to be. Also, one of the characters was a pirate! A PIRATE! (J! A PIRATE! :arr: ) Pirates are the best. Also, Jason Bateman has this fantastically stupid little part. (Jason Bateman, currently of Arrested Development fame, I have a total crush on. ^_^ )

So, hehe, my kind of movie! :D

Hehe, isn't that movie awesome? (As is Jason Bateman and Arrested Development). I wish I had the money to go buy it. Now that it's out though, only have to wait a few more weeks until Anchorman comes out! Last summer really had some hilarious movies ^^

acciofirebolt29 - December 17, 2004 09:42 PM (GMT)
OMG I LOVE Dodgeball!! That shit was the funniest!!

Has anyone seen Lemony Snicket....? I am going tonight but was curious of what people are saying?

banker - December 17, 2004 11:58 PM (GMT)
Well, I am giving Jason until my sister gets back w/ her stuff before ditching his ass for the Lemony Snicket movie. I've called, he's not returned. I shant be the ditchee, I'll beat him to the punch and be the ditcher... <_<

banker - December 18, 2004 03:48 AM (GMT)
Oh! I just got back from seeing it, and it was ever so good! Visually it was just awesome, and it was rather entertaining to watch. I was a bit perplexed when I thought they were going to take out a huge event from the first book, but it showed up eventually so, though a bit out of sequence, it all came around nicely ( granted, I've only read the first and part of the second book so it may not fit as nicely to someone whose read all three).
I must say, I am slightly put off that when someone (me) yells at the asshole teenagers who insist on shouting to each other from across the theater, I am the one people get angry at. If they would shut the hell up, I wouldn't be forced to yell in return. And anyone who doesn't like it can just bite me.

I can't believe I forgot to mention this, but they had a trailer for Willie Wonka in front of the movie. Holy shit does that look awesome. Granted, pretty much anything Tim Burton touches turns out awesome, but this movie, I can't describe it. I've never wanted to see a movie so badly just from seeing the trailer. I'd go see the Lemony Snicket movie again just so I could see the trailer.

jemlibris - December 18, 2004 05:59 AM (GMT)
They had a trailer with a racing zebra - something about Getting Stripes- before the movie & I might see that.

Besides Jim Carrey, the film has Billy Connelly, Meryl Streep, who played a most comical role as Aunt Josephine, Timothy Spall as Mr Poe, and Emily Browning as Violet. Emily Browning is an Australian 15 year old who has already played in The man who sued God with Billy Connelly as well as Ghost ship, Something in the Air, Darkness falls and the Australian TV police series, Blue Heelers.

Things to like: Narrator's role in the wheels and cogs of a gigantic clock. I didn't realise just how funny a character Aunt Josephine was until I saw this movie last night. I also liked the fidelity of much of the movie to the first 3 books in the series. Also I liked the explanation of how the Baudelaire Mansion burned down.

Things to dislike: Upbeat and somewhat preachy note at end. Mr Poe could have had a much more disgusting cough. Even the tapes managed that. Some changes to storyline, like Violet's not signing the marriage certificate in her own true hand, and the attempt on the Baudelaires' lives by locking them in a car across railway tracks with a locomotive due.

The movie was enjoyable but we did not agree with newspaper reviewers who suggested that the movie would equal the Harry Potter movies. Nor has it attracted the huge number of people wanting to see it yet. I agree with the statement that Series of Unfortunate Events is completely different from the Harry Potter movies.

acciofirebolt29 - December 18, 2004 06:49 PM (GMT)
Well I did go see it last night as well. I havent read the books so I cannot compare to them.

I really liked it a lot. I thought that Sunny and Aunt Josephine were the funniest things in the movie. It was truly a bizaar movie and that is what I liked about it. It was visually stunning. The kids were terrific actors as were the adults. I think a big fear is that Jim Carrey would go overboard, but I feel he contained himself pretty well. I dont know how others would feel who have read the books.

On another note...I saw screencaps from the Charlie and the Chocolate factory movie and was PRAYING they would show it before this movie!!

BUT NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! I am so mad. I guess I better go to the official site and watch it, because the screencaps themselves were impressive. Although JD looks like a freaky female in half of them...lol!!

Skivin'Ivy - December 22, 2004 09:51 AM (GMT)
I went and saw the movie ‘Hero’ last night. It was a beautiful movie – starring Jet Li and Maggie Cheung. It’s set in old China, and tells the story of three assassins, the Emperor and a warrior called Nameless. It was a visually stunning film. The fantasy martial arts scenes were too well choreographed to give any impression that they were ‘real’ in any sense – but they were fascinating to watch. The rich detail of the scenery, the drapery, the natural environment were all enhanced by delicate camera work. The costumes were absolutely lovely – the fabric, the exquisite colours, the movement and flow of the designs were very special. The three assassins – Sky, Flying Snow, and Broken Sword – were very well portrayed – and Jet Li was outstanding as Nameless.

The themes of the story were very strong too, and the final scenes left me overwhelmed with the messages of the film. Over-riding all others, was a quintessential Chinese theme of the acceptance of the sacrifice of one for the benefit of many.

While King Arthur was all about beautiful snow – Hero is all about beautiful water. The presentation of water is so gorgeously done – rain drops, tear drops, splashes from a lake – it is everywhere, and lovely. One scene shows a drop of rain being hit back and forward by the swords of the fighting warriors. Amazing.

The film was in Mandarin language, with English subtitles – but of course by the end of the movie, I felt that I could understand Mandarin perfectly without the subtitles – I was that in the moment of the film.

Highly recommend it! :)

aramantha - December 22, 2004 05:25 PM (GMT)
Well -- went to see ". . .Unfortunate Events." Visually very nice and atmospheric, tongue in cheek. Gorey-ish, but not so closely as to be derivative (except maybe the closing credits, which were priceless because they WERE Gorey-ish). The baby was fantastic, and Meryl Streep's role was wonderful.

Two things to say -- I agree with Godric (unfortunately) -- Jim Carrey was a pain in the neck, never stopped being Jim Carrey to start being Count Olaf, and I can think of a couple other people who would have done it much better (including either Gary Oldman or David Thewlis, or even Eddie Izzard, oddly). The other thing is that Liam Aikin is far more my idea of Harry Potter material than Dan Radcliffe, and too bad he was too young (and not British) when they started out.

banker - December 26, 2004 05:19 AM (GMT)
I took a Lord of the Rings-athon break to see Phantom of the Opera today. It was quite awesome. I've never had the opportunity to see the stage version, though it's been one of the ones I've wanted to since, oh, forever. :( It was really quite beautiful. I loved how they went from color to black and white, especially the first transition. And at risk of J throwing me in his steorotype box, I cried a little, just like I do when I listen to the cd's. Of all the musicals that have come out the past few years, this will be the one I'm inspired enough to buy for my collection.

Lupinfan80 - December 27, 2004 01:29 AM (GMT)
Just make sure to buy the soundtracks for the actual stage shows. The movie actors were decent singers, but they really cannot compare to the stage casts in vocal power. I rather liked the movie, like Banker. I made sure to check out some of the reviews, and was a bit surprised that so many people hated Phantom of the Opera in general, though I consider it my favorite musical. I guess being a real romantic can make you look past "insipid lyrics" and a score that supposedly repeats itself constantly, though I thought that was just known as a general theme tying a show together. Some critics said the songs weren't memorable and that audience members would thankfully not come away from the movie humming any of them involuntarily. Not only do I find the songs memorable, but I sing them all at top volume in my car. I have to admit that, when I was younger, I found some of the music a bit silly, with the combination of classical music with drums and synthesizers. Now I find it campy, melodramatic and fun. Gerard Butler is, admittedly, not scary as the Phantom, but I don't think any actor who's played the Phantom has been, besides Lon Chaney. Michael Crawford may be scary, but not in that way. Gerard also doesn't have the most powerful voice, but I found his performance passionate, and you feel sympathy for him as the Phantom. Most critics have also loved Emmy Rossum as Christine, but I thought she was a bit dull, to be honest. She's pretty, with a decent voice, but no one who has ever been in choir would believe her as an opera sensation. The real star of the movie, I have to say, is the look of it. It's not in any way dull. It's sumptuous and gorgeous. Another great thing is Minnie Driver, who I loved as Carlotta. She was apparently the only actor who's singing was dubbed, since she was supposed to be an opera diva. Since they felt the need to dub Minnie Driver, who is a great singer, I don't see why they couldn't have dubbed Emmy Rossum with someone with a more operatic talent. In all, though, I really enjoyed the movie. And I agree with Banker on how amazing it was when they transitioned from black and white to color. It was dramatic, theatrical, campy, and I loved it. Oh, and Gerard Butler is freaking gorgeous, too. See it, love the music. But remember, if you want to buy the music, go for the stage soundtracks. :thup: B)

banker - December 27, 2004 02:25 AM (GMT)
Hehe, I was waiting for Erin to mention Gerard Butler. He is rather beautiful. I was thinking I didn't care what was goin on under that mask, I'd choose him. Rarr!Yes, the stage cd's are about a thousand times better than what I heard last night, but that's really to be expected. And I've never gotten the whole idea of Phantom of the Opera being campy per se. If you want campy, you should probably watch Oklahoma or State Fair. I love the music from Phantom of the Opera. I jam to it at the top of my lungs too. Erin, why must we always be the ones to tell the world what is and what isn't awesome. When will they ever learn???

Going to see The Darkness on Tuesday. I'll report back...

MarxistLoveChild - December 27, 2004 06:01 PM (GMT)
i saw darkness. Very disappointing except for a few genuinely scary moments.

jemlibris - December 28, 2004 09:29 AM (GMT)
We (daughter - one of them) went to see Phantom of the Opera today and I agree it was a good movie. The change from black and white to colour was so good. You really get the feel of the times involved. Black and white certainly suits that devastated 1919 atmosphere, and colour that sumptuous, but slightly creepy, late 19th century, 1870, atmosphere.

I thought that Anthony Warlow or Michael Crawford were the better singers, having more beautiful & technically true voices. But Gerard Butler, I agree, did an excellent job. His voice is wilder, more ferocious, somehow, therefore, I found it more appropriate to the role of the Phantom of the Opera. I have every respect for Emily Rossum's ability to credibly reach the high notes. I certainly can't.

One thing the movie did well which was not clear from the stage show: Explain how and why both the Phantom and Christine got into that situation in the first place. However, the romance was still stylised, as my daughter said. There seems always to be a father complex involved, in some Hollywoodised stories. In Christine's case, this was the belief that the Phantom was the angel of music sent by her deceased dad. My daughter felt rather impatient with Christine's passivity and wondered why she couldn't have fought back a bit more.

I take it the man who won the music box at auction was Raoul, himself, by then an old and sick man. And that Christine had died two years earlier, as his wife. But who was the older woman bidding against him?

banker - December 28, 2004 01:41 PM (GMT)
Yes, Raoul was the old man bidding on the box. The woman bidding against him was Madame Giry (Rita Skeeter, hehe). Though I was slightly confused at first too, because Raoul looked so much older than her in that scene, when it should have been the other way around. Though, I suppose it could have been her daughter. Didn't she pick up the music box at the end of the 1870's sequence? Though I still think it makes more sense that it be her mother.

acciofirebolt29 - December 28, 2004 07:51 PM (GMT)
I thought it was Meg Giry too!! I think Madame Giry would be too old?? The one thing that I absolutely love is the "notes" sequence in the stage musical and I was pleased to see some form of it make the movie. IMO, the "Notes" sequence is one of the best written musical conversation between a group of people ever.

I was still not all to crazy about Gerard Butlers singing...some of it sounded like he was a bit retarded...maybe that was intentional...I dont know, I just love the soulfull beauty of Michael Crawfords voice.

Patrick Wilson, on the other hand, nailed Raoul!! I really liked the "Down once more" sequence when him and Phantom were singing together.

Lupinfan80 - December 29, 2004 01:39 AM (GMT)
QUOTE (jemlibris @ Dec 28 2004, 03:29 AM)


My daughter felt rather impatient with Christine's passivity and wondered why she couldn't have fought back a bit more.

I take it the man who won the music box at auction was Raoul, himself, by then an old and sick man. And that Christine had died two years earlier, as his wife. But who was the older woman bidding against him?

Her passivity bothered me, too. Especially, when the Phantom was threatening to kill Raoul and she just stood there like a ninny. Maybe it's just being a modern female, but I would've run into the water and at least tried to smack him around till he let him go.


I thought the woman in the beginning was Madame Giry, too, but considering that she look the same age as Raoul, if not younger, I would think it had to be Meg. I thought the scene by her grave was very touching, and was happy to see that she had lived long and they'd had a happy life.

banker - December 29, 2004 04:44 AM (GMT)
Um, yeah. The Darkness, totally sucked. You know it's bad when the mantra of the people leaving the theater is "dude, that just sucked!" Basically, the trailer was scarier than the movie. Don't even rent it...

aramantha - January 4, 2005 11:22 PM (GMT)
Nice duo -- felt like seeing two movies back to back after finally finishing grading, and I loved both of them.

Hero was marvellous. It has a Rashomon kind of structure to it -- three different versions (or explanations) of the events, each with its own color scheme echoing the prevailing passion of the explanation. The flying choreography isn't ever going to be as breathtaking again (after Crouching Tiger. . . ) but it added to the idea that the events were being described, not really taking place, and so were magical in memory. The water thing that Ivy is describing above is really wonderful -- the right archaic element to underlie the movie, despite all the sexual fire and idealistic air also moving back and forth on the less permanent levels. It is about abiding love and sorrow mostly -- different interpretations on getting to an end that is inevitable.

Finding Neverland was also wonderful (three hanky job -- but I love three hanky jobs). Johnny Depp has found another level -- he's very understated, but everything is on his face in the subtlest ways, and those gorgeous black eyes of his are working for him more than ever. I loved how they made his inner feelings and vision literal, and intercut it with the external reality from time to time (the first one is funny and also a bit disorienting -- he peeks out at his audience at the opening of his new play, which he knows is a bomb, and sees it raining right there in the theater on them while they sit there bored and unaware). There is something of the quality of that CS Lewis bio film with a splendid Anthony Hopkins that came out some years ago, called "Shadowlands" (another three hanky job), but this one is a lot more complex and into the twists and turns of the psychology of Barrie (although it's essentially very kind to him).

athenamay3410 - January 4, 2005 11:22 PM (GMT)
Over the holidays I finally saw Napoleon Dynamite!

I LOVE IT!

It is funny on so many levels. The acting is well done, considering it must have been hard not to crack up.

What makes this film so funny is how outrageous it kind of is. How Napoleon and his brother talk, Deb's jobs, Pedro's attempt at being school president, and Uncle Rico.

I don't want to spoil any of the laughs, so I'll stay quiet on that.

I really just enjoyed how unique this film is, and how it pulls it all off as a comedy.

I suggest you watch it at least a few times because I found the more I watched it, the funnier it became!

I'm sorry this is such a sparse review- but the only thing I can say is it's hilarious!

SakuraKinomoto03 - January 4, 2005 11:35 PM (GMT)
QUOTE (athenamay3410 @ Jan 4 2005, 06:22 PM)
I suggest you watch it at least a few times because I found the more I watched it, the funnier it became!

I agree. The first time I saw it, I didn't laugh a whole lot, but when I saw it again, it was a lot funnier. ^^ It's also a lot of fun to quote.

banker - January 4, 2005 11:46 PM (GMT)
We rented it from the room on new years. We were all pretty much wasted, but I remember liking it before I passed out initially. I have picked up some sweet catch phrases from it though. Alas, everyone else thought it was very stupid.

SakuraKinomoto03 - January 5, 2005 12:03 AM (GMT)
QUOTE (banker @ Jan 4 2005, 06:46 PM)
Alas, everyone else thought it was very stupid.

Idiots!

athenamay3410 - January 5, 2005 04:30 AM (GMT)
http://www.theseguys.com/pages/ND_soundboard.htm

For those of us that love Napoleon..

banker - January 5, 2005 04:44 AM (GMT)
awww, what about, "you're mom goes to college" hehe, i love that line

athenamay3410 - January 5, 2005 05:44 PM (GMT)
They also don't have the chapstick line!! "But my lips hurt real bad!"

Skivin'Ivy - January 9, 2005 12:26 AM (GMT)
I saw 'Before Sunset', with Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy, on the weekend. It is a bookend to 'Before Sunrise' with the same two actors, and is set 9 years after the first film. It was a lovely film - if you saw the first and liked it - you will definately like this one too! The question of whether they met as per their agreement 'six months later in Vienna' is answered - and nine years of thoughts, life events and feelings - are covered in one long conversation which takes place against the beautiful backdrop of Paris. It is a very chatty film, so be prepared to listen all the way thru - on lots of different levels. Ethan looked very unwell (not his character, but himself) - very gaunt, thin, physically fragile - hope he's feeling better now! and Delpy is a beautiful actor - lovely french accent!

I'm not sure if you could enjoy it if you haven't seen the first. But together - they are a wonderful film experience - worthwhile watching! :)

banker - January 9, 2005 06:35 AM (GMT)
Saw Finding Neverland tonight. It was quite lovely. At the risk of sounding rather foolish, I found it very...magical. I love how the last scene was shot. Very touching and poignant.

Hellebora - January 9, 2005 10:02 PM (GMT)
I saw Finding Neverland not so long ago and absolutely adored it-you're right-there is something so magical about it that really just makes you want more!Hopefully it'll be the one to snag JD the oscar!
Before Sunset is absolutely beautiful too-I hadn't seen the first one when I watched it and had no expectations of it but it gave me such a fuzy feeling inside-it was so real and fantastically shot-I loved it!
On Friday night I went to see Alexander and I have to say I don't know what all the fuss is about-it's not a great film but it's not some piece of cinematic scum dredged up from the deep-sure some of it was corny, particularly the death of a partiular character but the fact that both Jared Leto and Val Kilmer seemed to have a deeper Irish accent than Colin Farrell was the most perplexing part for me.
It wasn't a great movie but I really don't think it deserved the lashing that it got

krapp_420 - January 11, 2005 05:41 PM (GMT)
We rented The Lady Killers this weekend and I absolutly loved it. The only grip I had was Tom Hanks character just kept going on. I noticed I tended to kinda tune out when he got going on his monologue. But very enjoyable non the less. Highly recommend it.

banker - January 17, 2005 08:01 PM (GMT)
I saw In Good Company last night. I dont' really want to say anything about it because it might ruin it for others, but I really liked it. I loved the ending. I was a bit scared that I wasn't going to, but the resolution worked well and it's what would happen in real life, not some cheesy hollywood movie. I'd recommend it. Topher Grace is awesome. How Ashton gets all the attention, I'll never know. Topher has more talent than Asthon could ever hope to have

Hellebora - January 24, 2005 12:43 PM (GMT)
Saw Million Dollar Baby yesterday and thought it was fantastic-Hilary Swank was amazing and I'll bet that oscar is pretty much hers already-there were so many emotions I went through watching it-I'd definitely reccommend it!

Lupinfan80 - January 27, 2005 03:28 AM (GMT)
QUOTE (banker @ Jan 17 2005, 02:01 PM)
I saw In Good Company last night. I dont' really want to say anything about it because it might ruin it for others, but I really liked it. I loved the ending. I was a bit scared that I wasn't going to, but the resolution worked well and it's what would happen in real life, not some cheesy hollywood movie. I'd recommend it. Topher Grace is awesome. How Ashton gets all the attention, I'll never know. Topher has more talent than Asthon could ever hope to have

Yeah, I loved this movie, too! Everyone in it was good, and it had some great humor. I love how that jerk boss ended up getting fired at the end. Oh, and I am a HUGE Topher Grace fan! And, Scarlett Johansen is one of the few actresses cool enough to be his love interest and not piss me off. I can get a bit jealous. And yes, Ashton Kutcher has wrongfully garnered the attention for too long. The real star from That 70's Show is finally starting to get some credit. :D I can't wait to see him in more movies.




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